How do I get my toddler to listen without yelling?

Get close and say one short direction in a calm voice. Matching a child's yelling with your own tends to make things worse, says pediatric psychologist Emily Mudd of Cleveland Clinic.

How do I get my toddler to listen the first time?

Say it once, clearly, then wait a few seconds without repeating it, the Child Mind Institute suggests.

Should I ask my toddler or tell them?

Tell them. A clear statement, like "Please put your shoes on", works better than a question your child can answer with no.

Is there a following directions social story starring my child?

Tella makes one starring your child, with the directions that are hard at your house, and it's ready the same day on your phone, tablet or TV.

All habits

How to get your toddler to listen

Get close, say exactly what you want in a few words, one step at a time, and give your child a moment to do it.

Custom story for Owen

Owen is having too much fun at the park to hear it's time to go, until Dad crouches down close and says one clear step.

Orange Shoes and the Slide Zoom

Story created for Owen

Tell rather than ask, says the Child Mind Institute: "Please sit down" works better than "Are you ready to sit down?" It suggests speaking from close by instead of across the room, using specific, simple words, giving one step at a time, and giving the reason first, then the direction. Then wait a few seconds without repeating it, so your child learns a direction given once still counts.

A social story is one way to practice: your child sees themselves hear the words, stop what they're doing, and do the next step. That's why Tella is built so the story stars your child, in your home, with the real moments when listening is hard, like leaving the park or getting dressed.

A following directions social story video starring your child

Here's how Owen's story goes.

Dad calls from across the park, but Owen is upside down on the slide and doesn't hear.
So Dad crouches close, looks him in the eyes and says one clear step: shoes on.
Owen hears it, stops, and puts his orange shoes on all by himself.
Dad praises him for listening the very first time.

Watch Owen’s whole story

Questions parents ask

How do I get my toddler to listen without yelling?: Get close and say one short direction in a calm voice. Matching a child's yelling with your own tends to make things worse, says pediatric psychologist Emily Mudd of Cleveland Clinic.
How do I get my toddler to listen the first time?: Say it once, clearly, then wait a few seconds without repeating it, the Child Mind Institute suggests.
Should I ask my toddler or tell them?: Tell them. A clear statement, like "Please put your shoes on", works better than a question your child can answer with no.
Is there a following directions social story starring my child?: Tella makes one starring your child, with the directions that are hard at your house, and it's ready the same day on your phone, tablet or TV.

Questions parents ask about Tella

Is it more screen time?: You watch it together, and it's about a real day in your child's life. No feed, and every story has an ending.
Is it safe?: No photo needed. See what we keep and who sees it.
Is it really about my child?: Every scene shows your child and your family, not a name dropped into a template.
What does it cost?: Your first story is free. No card needed.
Why not just ask ChatGPT?: See how a Tella story compares.

Updated October 30, 2026.

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